Today I start the new year as a new wife. Having been married before, never did I imagine myself getting married again. In fact, I didn’t want to. I balked and bailed. I took two steps forward and one step back. I started and stopped a million times. I have commitment phobia. Maybe I even have abandonment syndrome. Maybe I have a gazillion of other undiagnosed mental disorders. Maybe I just didn’t want to be married, committed, and my sense of freedom and independence bound. Or maybe I did not want to make the same mistakes or fail again. But Lia, the light in our lives, the center of our big universe, the cord that ties all of us together, is the reason why we are here.
It is the first week of January 2012 and I find myself sitting on a stool, typing away on my laptop which sits atop a plain white wooden table, glancing every once in a while at three other big monitors on tables on my left and right in front of me, music playing, while people walk up and down the wooden steps of this urban minimalist office I happened to have found myself in this Londony afternoon (read: umbrellas) – contemplating on some statements slash accusations hurled at me on the phone by some Neanderthal (oops livin high and yu-uh, takin it easy). Strangely enough, this office reminds me of some bar called S. Yes, bright white lights and walls and bookcases (real or imagined) always remind me of offices. Maybe that is the reason why I wouldn’t want to hang out at Bar S. Who wants to hang out at the end of a work day and still feel like you’re still at the office? Regardless of who owns this bar or that bar, I have a predisposition for dim lights.
A predisposition to never be that exposed, but maybe only by a tad? A desire to not be too seen, to be there, but not really be there, a choice to be social or anti, aloof or otherwise. Yes, dim lights.
What am I doing here, really? I’m here because the beach is here. The beach is calling me (cue in: All Saints’ Pure Shores). Arriving at the grand terminal two nights ago, with the weather comparable to that of windy, rainy, minus snowy, Chicago in February, with my evergreen everbright big backpack heavier than mine and Lia’s combined weight and an overnight bag packed with all that I might ever need, including cottonbuds, I asked myself that question. What am I doing here really?
I had come from somewhere else that day and got home late. We arrived at 70’s Bistro quite late and missed one or two band performances. I spent some time hanging out with friends and did not take a lot of photos. Here are the shots I managed to take.
After spending the evening with my parents and my sisters’ families in the condo in Taguig where we actually used to live, we went home to put Lia to sleep, then at eleven thirty in the evening, drove off to Eastwood to welcome the New Year with drinks and watch the fireworks. It was alright, though I could not help but remember last year’s when we were at the penthouse watching all the fireworks all over Metro Manila for hours and hours.
The photos are here, but you have to add me as contact on Flickr to view. 😉
Save the date, Jan. 8, 2011!
This 2011, get ready to rock and roll your way to adventure! On January 8, 2011, Travel Factor is proud to invite all of you to
We Know Adventure
The Travel Factor 2011 Launch
Happening at the legendary rock house, 70’s Bistro, start the year rocking with Pedicab, Peryodiko, Johnoy Danao, Pumping Pluto and more.